Review of the year

Ive been doing a review of the year -

So its New Years eve 2012 and I’m racing towards the start of the year of my 50th Birthday (eek) and I am looking back at what I’ve achieved this year and I have to say that it didn’t seem to amount much and certainly not a patch on what I achieved in 2011 – and that was a really difficult year all round for me. But its not really as bad as I thought.
In January we climbed Pen y Fan again – but with both our daughters this time 
In February I managed to get myself in the accident book at Cardiff Ice Rink after having a skating lesson LOL but also walked out to Whitford Point in Gower.
In March I attended an even with my boss and was definitely the most OVERDRESSED woman there – typical.
In April we saw the Glossy Ibis in Marloes Mere and the Cappuccino Girls in Swansea – great company, great show and attended the first show in the newly reopened Gwyn Hall.
In May I played the Wii for the very first time (yes really).
In June we went on the ferry to Ireland – first time in Dublin – fantastic.
In July I spent a fabulous day on one of Brigits Bee courses – amazing.
In August I didn’t get my eyes ‘done’ like planned but had a fab few days in Brum and also went to the Black Country Museum.
In September I failed to complete my 9 mile hike for British Heart – wrecked my ankle and had to come home – doh!! And I turned 49, had an amazing birthday with fab friends and family. Met two new great nieces and my great nephew (and saw my nieces other halves for the first time) and got to the final WWT site – all nine visited now.
In October I saw the Hairy Bikers in Cardiff and held a fund raising event in work for ABF .
In November I saw Kevin Bridges in Cardiff.
Finally in December I have passed my ILM Level 5 course, seen 120 plus Waxwings, 50 plus Snipe, watched the Siren Sisters in the Gwyn Hall, youngest got a new job to start in January (well done sweety), eldest got engaged (congrats sweety)

I also made two new really close friends, made contact with a couple of old ones and hopefully am ending the year still sane(ish).
But to the rest of you who joined in with helping make this the year it was – thank you - you know who you are and what you did xxxx

Phew – okay 2013 whats next – make it good!

18 days to go!

Pack has arrived!!!

Somehow when Pete registered he ended up being Professor Sharp LMHO!!! Just adds to the whole madness of it all.

18 days to go :)

Inspiration

There have been a couple of things lately that have warmed my heart and inspired me.  Quite a list actually. 

Things that have been happening to friends, watching them overcome health problems, fighting back against long standing issues.  Of course the heart warming part is seeing them win, the inspiring part is seeing how they have handled the fight.

This evening I happened on a programme on S4C - a Llangollen concert, Karl Jenkins The Peacemakers.  Karl Jenkins has composed some amazing music,  Adiemus being my favourite. It made me think of  both my daughters, who have been in choirs and performed his music, which led me to think of them as much younger children and being in school.  The camera then panned across to a young man, playing the cello beautifully.  I knew, before the camera moved up to his face, that it was Steffan Morris. Steffan and his sister were school with my daughters, his mum gave my older daughter her first piano lessons and his aunt was teacher to one daughter and choir mistress to both.  This incredibly talented young man always makes me smile.  His dedication to his art is inspiring.  I remember being told that he would practice early in the morning, before school, as well as into the evening.  It is always a delight to see him play.  At the end of his piece he shook Karl Jenkins hand and then .... he took over as conductor!  After the initial 'wow' moment I settled in to watch this very young man hold the respect and concentration of a huge choir and marvelled at how relaxed he was in his role.  At the end of the performance the announcer said (in Welsh but I got it) that Steffan's mum, dad and sister were in the Choir.  Wow again.  I had hit record so that I could show it to the girls, so I quickly ran it back to see if I could find them.  I watched the whole section and found his mum and his sister.  When we got back to the end of the section again I realised that his sister was in the final shot with him, absolutely beaming at him, full of pride for her younger brother. 

The music had given me shivers, in only the way that a well written, well performed piece can. I always feel sorry for people who have never experienced that. Watching the whole family sharing the moment was just so heart warming. Talking of moments, seeing that young man's success was a real 'grin' one for me.  Because although I know that he has worked extremely hard and im sure that there have been difficult times for him, it was nice to see someone apparently taking life in his stride and loving every minute of it.  Something we could all look to at least try to do.

So young Mr Morris - thank you for the exceptional performance, for the trip down memory lane to Ysgol Gymraeg Castell Nedd and for the 'grin' moment. 

When you have walked back and forward, lost endlessly on well trodden paths. When you have wandered from sad to bad, from desperate to desolate and you find yourself staring into the abyss – don’t jump in!

Don’t let yourself fall and don’t allow yourself to be pushed.  Look around you for those ways less often used, by you or anyone else.  They may not be immediately obvious, it may be that you have to search for them and it may be that you need to call out to a friend to help you.

The most wonderful paths in life are those where you have to seek the way, to push through obstacles, to explore, sometimes doubling back on yourself before you find the way.  But in the end those paths can lead you to a feeling of achievement, self worth, peace of mind, security, happiness, health or all of these. Life isn’t always a straight, flat road.  We are meant to work hard to climb the hill, so we can be rewarded with the view and the pleasure of the stroll back down.

Longer Steps

Yesterday I received an email - my regular Countryfile Magazine email - I spent a while looking at the various articles, read that this Sunday's programme will be talking about Suffolk, particularly the area around Aldeburgh, looked at the various walks they were promoting this time and then an advert popped up which really caught my eye.

It was for the British Heart Foundation, the first thing I saw was footprints, the next was the words 'Leeds to Skipton' (I love Yorkshire), but it was a rolling advert with the pages changing and what I had missed was the words 'Hadrians Wall' - somewhere Ive always wanted to see and walk a section of - now what made me click at that point was certainly a moment of madness, simply because my head was already telling me 'dont be daft, it will be a marathon distance, you'd be mad', but ........ click I did and there it was - 'support the BHF by walking a 10 mile section of the wall' or words similar to that. 

Actually what it says is 'This trail is not for the timid'.  Well I dont think I've been timid for a while now,  so .... I registered. 

Its in September, so actually it could be very cold, wet, possibility of snow or ice, definitely windy, in fact all round exposed! Even a mile in those conditions would be miserable.  So I comfort myself that this IS a challenge.  Okay so its not a marathon distance (though the Stonehenge to Avebury memory walk is still on my list) but i'll still do my best to raise as much as I can and keep my fingers crossed for a warmish, dry September.

And of course the BHF is an organisation Ive supported for a long time.  Ever since 1997 in fact, when my dad died from a massive heart attack.  It was quick, it was a shock and he was only 58, far too soon.  His own father had suffered from 'flutterings of the heart' during a routine operation before he was to be demobed (1945) and died on the table.  My grandfather, on my mum's side, had to have a triple bypass and my gran, (dads mum) also died from a heart attack but at least at 80.

So you see im surrounded by the problem.  So it was time.  Last year I raised money for Cancer Research by doing the Race for Life twice, and also by completing a Memory Walk for the Alzheimers Org. 

So this year im going to follow my heart and do something good for my own heart, something good for others' hearts and something good for the organisation.  I'll have the exercise, not only on the day but before as I prepare.  The organisation will get the advertising and the money which will help educate some and assist others with existing problems. And its good for the soul, being outside, knowing you are doing something to help others and at the same time helping yourself in endless ways.  Though im sure, when I hit mile 8 or 9 that I will be questioning my sanity at doing such a thing and grumbling. But hey, thats then!

For the moment im really pleased to be getting the chance to achieve an ambition as well as help the BHF.

My hubby is going to walk with me and is really chuffed to be getting to walk part of the wall too.  We had a bit of a wobble when he realised that we should wear red! He doesnt do red (odd I know, since he is a Welshman LOL) but he's going to at least carry the tshirt LOL.

So the link to donate is below.  Any small amount would be appreciated but, like it says on our page, if you cant spare the cash, please spare some things you no longer need and take them to your nearest BHF charity shop so they can raise money that way.  My nearest one is in Neath. Im sure there will be one not far from you too.

So thank you in advance.

http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/team/madminiogs

What goes down .....

must manage somehow to get back up again!

This year seems to have been less about climbing up and more about climbing down.  Trouble with that once you have climbed down! you have to climb back up again.  Still these things have to be done.

On Saturday we decided to visit the Gower Wildflower Cafe to have a look around and get some lunch.  Sadly there wasn't much there in the way of plants but we had an amazing lunch (OH's was a beef chilli pastie AND beans - pity there's no spare room!) and there was so many tempting organic and free range goodies to buy that I could have spent an absolute fortune.  I did splash out on a jar of Gower Honey (that's the dog starving for the next week lol).

These lovely meals were accompanied by lovely coffees and there was definitely the need to drag our lazy selves out  to walk off all that food (not to mention consider fasting for the rest of the weekend).

So we groaned our way back to the car, grabbed the map and looked where, in Gower, we hadn't been. 

Southgate! Between Pennard and Three Cliffs.  I'm ashamed to say I'd never even heard of it but I'm delighted to have found it now.  There appeared to be two paths down to the beach / bay (there may be more) and the one we chose is really steep in parts. As we walked down over mud, then scree, then broken concrete over a pipe my brain was thinking - bad move - at least when you walk up first, you have the comforting thought of the potentially more relaxed walk down.  However, at least we'd be walking off some of that meal. On the way down we were serenaded by Dunnocks who flitted from shrub to shrub in front of us, which distracted from the steep descent.

The sand was much softer than we imagined but on reaching the beach the delights were numerous.  Fantastic rock formations, the like of which I don't really remember seeing anywhere else, which created fantastic rock pools, full of life.

As we explored the beach, looking across to Oxwich point, we could hear birds calling above us.  One bird's call made us both stop and look up immediately.  Could it be what we thought it was .... I managed to catch a quick glimpse of it as disappeared round the edge of the cliffs.  OH was luckier and managed to catch this. (Clever boy!)

Of course - its a Chough -  and we were chuffed to see a Chough (sorry bad joke LOL). 

The weather started to turn a little darker and we puffed our way back up to the top of the hill, but it was made all the better by enjoying watching a pair of Stonechats as the male sang and 'chinked' his little heart out at the top of one of the shrubs.  Once we reached the top, we turned and walked a little way across the top of the cliffs towards Pennard, stopping every now and then to take pictures and to watch the many gulls battling with the wind above us.

The afternoon was great in all ways.  Lovely food, a beach for OH,  a cliff walk for me and bird watching and great views for us both.

Perfick!

Sad but smiling

Rubbish title, sorry.. 

An uncle of mine died on Wednesday evening.  It was expected but sad all the same.  He would have been 88 this year.  I say uncle, Great Uncle is actually the correct description, in more ways than one. He was my grandmothers brother, one of 4 brothers.  But the sadness that he has gone doesnt last at all because every time I think of him, I'm smiling - because it seemed like he was always smiling.  His resting expression was with an upturned mouth, ready, waiting to break into that smile or to throw his head back in that laugh.  Thinking of that makes me smile even more, because its the same laugh that they all share(d), my Grandmother, her brothers, my mum, her younger brother and my cousins.  And of course me.  Thinking about him for the last few days has made me recognise some traits which are definitely from that side of the family and its lovely to think that they are the good ones.  We have the same smile, the same sense of humour and the same laugh, and yes I suppose thats to be expected, but its nice to have inherited those good things.

He was a shepherd and farm worker for most of his life, had that ruddy complexion that goes with spending your life outdoors, he would greet us girls with a bear hug that would take your breath away - something all three of my grandmother's younger brothers are known to do - or the men with a strong handshake and a slap on the back. His name was Peter and its always been a source of amusement to me that my family, like many, have not been very original with names.  Both sides of my mum's side of the family are filled with Peters, Andrews, Williams, Georges and Johns.  So of course my cousin and I followed suit and I married a Peter and she married an Andrew. LOL

Our family is very large and my grandmother's youngest brother is only 5 years older than my mother.  Not uncommon in those days.  So these Great Uncles and Aunts have been considered as purely uncles and aunts, and my mum's cousins have been like mine, on both my grandmothers and grandfathers side of the family. My mum's two brothers have been like big brothers to me (and as just as irritating on times as if they were real brothers but I love them really).

So on Friday I will be flying to Scotland at some ridiculous time to spend the day back with those smiling people and yes, we will be sad and yes we will be drinking 'tea' afterwards in my mum's cousin's pub (tea?? - really?) but mostly we will be remembering.  Remembering a lovely, happy and generous man who I'm really grateful to have known and even more proud to be related to.

Misty moments

Nope ... I've not beeh on Pen y Fan again - I've been into the new foyer area of the Gwyn Hall.

For those of you who dont know, the Gwyn Hall is in the centre of Neath and has been an important building since the late 1800's.  It was Howel Gwyn, who was the benefactor of the Gwyn Hall. In his time he had been an  alderman, a town councillor, a mayor, Freeman of the Borough, chairman to the board of Guardians, High Sheriff of Glamorgan and MP for Brecon and Falmouth. A busy man.

His 'hall' has hosted quote 'concerts, plays, musicals and even wrestling matches. Adelina Patti performed on numerous occasions; Charles Dickens (junior) gave a recital of his father’s works to an appreciative audience in 1889; David Lloyd George once gave a speech there and a young Leo McKern appeared with the Western Theatre Company in ‘Cockpit’ in 1948. More recent stars that have treaded the Gwyn’s stage are actor Steven Meyo, opera star Katherine Jenkins and the Stereophonics'. 

Oh ... and I've performed there too! And so have both my daughters and I never realised that we were in such prestigious company. 

The hall was closed in 2006 ready to be renovated.  In October 2007, in the middle of what was becoming a really sympathetic and special renovation, the centre of the building was totally destroyed by fire.  The flames were to be seen for miles they were so high.  Many people thought at first that it was St Davids Church that was on fire and though it was a relief that it wasnt, it was devastating that the hall was totally gutted, only its outer shell intact - just. 

So late this afternoon I went to Neath, just for a little wander.  I went to NRG for coffee first and then for a look in a few shops. On my way back to the car I noticed that people were going into the new glass fronted area of the hall.  Tentatively, I walked through the door to be greeted by a member of staff offering me a brochure and ready to explain all about the opening hours, the cafe and what was going on generally.  I said to her that it was so strange to be standing by the arches again.  She agreed but noted that it was amazing however.  I agreed and then two other members of staff joined her.  We talked briefly about how fantastic it was to see the hall opening again. I said that I would see them on Saturday, because I was booked on one of the opening tours.  I left, smiling, excited that finally it was going to be opening again. 

Then a raft of memories washed over me.  Being part of the chorus; taking lead parts; laughing in the dressing rooms, the horrendous stage make up, liquid paraffin to take the make up off (seriously), character shoes, lights in your eyes, the orchestra, the producers; Monday night nerves, Saturday night chaos when anything could happen - and did; scenery falling down; missing cues; forgetting lines; always doing things in the same order night after night because to change it was unlucky; drinking wine in the intervals; apart from the matinee when there was tea; the wonderful women who made our tea, our makeup, our costumes; the children running around outside selling programmes before the performances, seeing who could sell the most; the ticket office, with my Aunty Mary (sadly no longer with us) in residence for the week; our photos in local shops; oh and more so much more.  My first show - Kings Rhapsody'; my last - Annie. Names of people, long gone; faces of people who's names I cant remember; learning the Welsh National Anthem by having the words pinned onto the back of the dress of the person in front of me in the finale and learning how much music means in Wales.

By the time I had reached the car I realised that I was ever so slightly misty eyed, actually I was quite choked. The Gwyn Hall was one of the first places I visited when I moved to Wales. Its a place where I made friends, sang and danced with friends and family, watched my children perform for school, Eisteddfods and a musical theatre company. Seen concerts, operas, shows and bands.  It is so intertwined with my life in Wales, in Neath and I had forgotten really quite how much I had missed it.  

So a new chapter starts for the Hall and I fully intend to be part of its new story, in one way or another.  
Step one is to take the tour on Saturday, step two is to go and see the first show there - The Full Monty - the musical version.  Now thats what I call bringing it into the 21st Century with a smirk and wink!

What a year!!

A bit late but I've just been doing a bit of a look back at the things Ive done since I first walked up Fan Fawr last year.  There were quite a few moments of 2011 that I definitely want to forget about BUT hey - get this list!

• Ive climbed up, walked to or walked in -

• Fan Fawr
• Garreg Lwyd
• Cribarth
• Tair Carn Isaf & Uchaf
• Llyn y fan fach
• Llyn y fan fawr
• Whiteford Point
• Carreg Cennen
• Swgd yr Eira
• British Camp, Malverns
• Malham Cove 
• Mynydd Ichyd
• Elan Valley
• Corn Ddu
• Melin cwrt falls
• Rhosilli Down
• Henrhyd waterfall
• Some hill in Yorkshire - cant remember the name! 
• The mountain behind Dan Yr Ogof (Garreg Goch?)
• Pen y Fan - 5 TIMES!!!!!!! well 5 to the top (once on my own!) and another twice, once where we only got to the base of Corn Ddu and once when we only made it 3/4 way up.  The most recent ascent was on the anniversary of climbing Fan Fawr - and this time Becky made it all the way up to the top too.
• Ive been to North Wales and been at the base of the Pyg Track - too late in the day and with the wrong sort of weather to even consider climbing up.

• I took part in the Race for Life twice and the Memory walk once (Thank you all you wonderful people who sponsored me for the three events)

• I been out on the bike I bought - cycling in the Afan Valley and on the Millennium Coastal Path. 

• I had my first ever motorbike lesson!

• I had an amazing rally driving experience.

• Ive had an ice skating lesson. 

•  Visited the Eden Project

• Seen the summer solstice sun come up over Pentre Ifan in Pembrokeshire and sat on Pen Y Fan watching the sun go down over Fan Fawr.

• I had a go at abseiling - but chickened out at the last moment (and scarily the pack to have a go this year arrived today - eeeek) 

• Visited Oxford for the first time and climbed up the Carfax Tower!  

Now if you look at each thing on its own ... well there isn't anything outstanding there really.

But put them all together ...... the last 13 months have been fairly amazing.

Ive walked further than I ever dared imagine, I've pushed myself to do things that I'd always wanted to but never felt I could, I've beaten my fears on some things and not on others and I've fought personal and work battles and won!

And that's the biggest thing I suppose -

I won!

Another one bites the dust (well ice)

I ticked off another thing on my list this evening.  Myself and a group of friends had an ice skating lesson. 

I did find my balance, well in part, and our two instructors were amazing.  Id managed to badly bruise my finger grabbing the side of the rail at the start but my Pièce de résistance was typical of that 'pride comes before a fall' scenario. All we were doing was moving from one side of the rink to the other towards the end of the lesson, when I had my best Bambi moment of the whole evening.  There was nothing to be done, nothing there to save myself and seconds later I was flat out on the ice, having whacked my elbow and smacked my head good and proper! So I ended my first lesson in the first aid room, stretched out on a bench, feet raised, ever so slightly dazed.

Then I had the embarrassing joy of completing an accident form - I dont do ANYTHING by halves!

I was told not to drive, so my friend drove for me, I was told not sleep, so I'm still awake, I'm bruised and my head hurts like hell but Ive never laughed so much in my life even though that, in addition to my wonderful dying swan routine, I did several impressions of Bambi during the hour long lesson. In fact it was my laughing that was literally my downfall - when I laugh I put my head back - flippin lethal on the ice.

But damn it was fun.  Thanks girls, for your company, support and a fantastic evening xxx

Sticks and Stones

'Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me' Right? ....................... Wrong!!

I found out yesterday, to my surprise, that someone in from my past used to refer to me in a rather derogatory way.  I'm not going to divulge how, but I was shocked to be told.  Shocked to the core in fact.  My heart sank when I realised that someone who I had admired, someone much older who quite frankly should have known better, held me in such low esteem.  I thought that I was like by this person, in fact I was actually told that.

So why? Why would they do that, why would they think it was okay and for gods sake why does this upset me so much? 

I suppose it is because I DID admire this person, because I DID think that I was liked, respected, that they were even fond of me, but I suppose mostly because we all like to be liked.

It made what had been mostly a good day for me, a totally, utterly miserable one and I feel ridiculously sad.